XXXVI

I wanted to make a thank you entry for a certain person. Thanking him for the past year. It has been amazing and I've learned so much thanks to him. I've learned how to face any hardships I have on my way and to believe in myself when no one else does. I believe that I can achieve almost anything I want in this life if I just have the courage to go for it. I've learned that there's no one who can tell me how to live my life or who I should be. I've learned to hold my head up high but at the same time have a respect for others. I've learned that we're all here to write our own stories and no one else can write it for us. I've also learned to question things in life that I've never even thought before. I've learned that I want to make a change in the world before my time here on Earth is over, even though it would be only a tiny one.

So thank you Yohio. I'm not sure if you'll ever read this but I still wanted to write you this message. Please have an amazing year of 2015 and I promise I'll support you as long as I can.

Show me that your smile can change the world we live in [Ssource]

XXXV

Bold what you've done:

Appearance
I had piercings besides the ears
I want piercings besides the ears
I have a scar
I tan easily
I wish my hair was a different color
I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color
I want a tattoo
I can be self-conscious about my appearance
I have/had braces
I have more than two piercings

Embarrassment
Disney movies still make me cry sometimes
I’ve laughed so hard I’ve cried
I’ve glued my hand to something
I’ve laughed until some kind of beverage came out of my nose
I’ve had my pants rip in public
I’ve touched something sharp/hot/etc to see if it would hurt



Health
I’ve gotten stitches
I’ve broken or dislocated a bone
I’ve had my tonsils removed
I’ve had my wisdom teeth removed
I’ve had chicken pox

Travel
I’ve been to Florida
I’ve driven/ridden over 200 miles in one day
I’ve been on a plane
I’ve been to California
I’ve been to Asia.
I’ve been to Niagara Falls.
I’ve been to Vanuatu or the Mystery Islands
I’ve been to the Caribbean
I’ve been to Europe

Experiences
I’ve gotten lost in my city
I’ve seen a shooting star
I’ve wished on a shooting star
I’ve seen a meteor shower
I’ve gone out in public in my pajamas
I’ve pushed all the buttons on an elevator
I’ve slapped someone
I’ve kissed someone underwater
I’ve chugged something
I’ve crashed a car
I’ve been skiing
I’ve been in a musical
I’ve auditioned for something
I’ve been on stage
I’ve caught a snowflake on my tongue
I’ve sat on a rooftop at night
I’ve pranked someone
I’ve ridden in a taxi

Honesty / Crime
I’ve been threatened to be arrested.
I’ve done something I promised someone I wouldn’t
I’ve snuck out
I’ve lied about my whereabouts
I’ve cheated while playing a game
I’ve been in a fist fight

Death
I’m afraid of dying
I hate funerals
I’ve seen someone/something die
Someone I know has attempted/committed suicide

Materialism
I own over 5 rap CD’s
I’m obsessed with anime/manga
I collected comic books
I own a lot of makeup
I own something from Pac Sun
I own something from The Gap
I own something I got on E-Bay
I own something from Abercrombie
I thrive on compliments
I thrive on hate

Random
I can sing low key
I’ve stolen a tray from a fast food restaurant
I open up to others easily
I watch the news occasionally or always
I don’t like to kill bugs
I sing in the shower
I’m a morning person
I’m a sports fanatic
I twirl my hair
I care about grammar
I love to spam friends
I’ve copied more than 30 CD’s in a day.
I bake well
I would wear pajamas to school
I like Martha Stewart
I laugh at my own jokes
I eat fast food weekly
I’ve not turned something in and still got an A in a certain class
I can’t sleep if there’s a spider in the room
I’m really ticklish
I like white chocolate
I bite/used to bite my nails
I’m good at remembering names
I’m good at remembering dates
I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life

People
..used to ask if I was anorexic/bulimic
..have called me fat
..have said I’m skinny
..have said I’m ugly
..have said I’m pretty
..have spread rumors about me
..forced me to eat
..say I eat too much
..say I eat too little

Eating
I’ve lost weight quickly
I’ve gained weight quickly
I’m at my thinnest
I’m at my biggest
I’ve lost weight and kept it off
I’ve lost weight, but gained it back
My weight affects my mood
I diet
I’m vegan/vegetarian. not quite, but I don’t like meat much
I exercise
I’ve fainted from exhaustion

Family
I’ve sworn at my parents
I’ve planned to run away from home before
I’ve run away from home
I have a sibling less than one year old
I want kids in the future
I’ve had kids
I’ve lost a child

Relationships
I’m engaged
I’m married
I’m single
I’ve gone on a blind date
I have/had a friend with benefits
I miss someone right now
I have a fear of abandonment
I’ve gotten divorced.
I’ve had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back
Someone has/had feelings for me when I didn’t have them back
I’ve told someone I loved them when I didn’t
I’ve told someone I didn’t love them when I did
I’m a cuddler
I’ve been kissed in the rain
I’ve hugged a stranger
I’ve kissed a stranger

Bad times
I regularly drink
I can’t swallow pills
I can swallow numerous pills at a time without difficulty
I’ve been diagnosed with depression at some point
I have/had anxiety problems.
I shut others out when I’m upset.
I don’t have anyone to talk to when I’m upset about something personal
I have taken/take anti-depressants.
I’ve slept an entire day before
I’ve plotted revenge

XXXIV

I remembered I have a blog! Sorry I haven't been able to make new entries, been super busy ;-; I try to write something more interesting next time!

30 anime related questions!

1. My first anime:
- DN Angel
2. My favorite anime:
- Kuroko no Basuke ´u`
3. The first anime character I was obsessed with:
...probably Sasuke... OTL But I'm not sure what you mean with obsessed D: Since Sasuke was the first chara I liked very much but Sebastian (from Kuroshitsuji) was first chara whose merchandise I bought...
4. My anime OTP:
- AoKaga! (Aomine and Kagami from Kuroko no Basuke)
5. An anime I can’t stand:
- Rurouni Kenshin... I watched 27 episodes of it and it was just horrible
6. An anime I want to watch:
- Right now Hyouka, Mushishi, Shirobako, Tokyo Ghoul, Sakurasou no Pet na Kanojo and Kuroshitsuji: Book of Murder are on my plan to watch list
7. An anime I never finished:
- Naruto, Naruto Shippuuden and Rurouni Kensin ::D
8. The most recent anime I finished:
- Haikyuu!!
9. An anime I never thought of watching but fell in love with:
- Kuroko no Basuke :b
10. My favorite genre of Anime:
- Sports or shoujo?
11. Shounen or Shoujo:
- Shoujo
12. My favorite anime character of all time:
- Sebastian from Kuroshitsuji c: Or Kagami Taiga from Kuroko no Basuke
13. An anime that I introduced to a friend:
- Toradora, Free!, Death Note, Suki na Mono wa Suki Dakara Shou ga Nai!, Shiki, Kuroshitsuji and Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki-kun
14. The anime(s) that I am currently watching:
- Ao Haru Ride, Kill la Kill, Kiseijuu and Ookami Shoujo to Kuro Ouji
15. An anime that never gets old no matter how many times I watch it:
- Kuroko no Basuke and Kaichou wa Maid-Sama!
16. Do I own any anime merchandise:
- Do I? (That pic is few years old so...)
17. Yaoi or Yuri:
- Yaoi all the way!
18. If I’ve ever been to an anime convention:
- Animecon/Finncon 2009,2011, Animecon 2012,2013,2014, Desucon 2011,2012,2013,2014, Desucon Frostbite 2013,2014 and Chibicon 2014
19. Who is my favorite anime voice actor:
- Daisuke Ono!
20. Sub or Dub?
- Sub ò-ó Who can watch anime that's dubbed ugh...
21. If I could have any anime character’s hair style, who would it be:
- Momoi's from Kuroko no Basuke? I don't know D:
22. Manga or Anime?
- Anime
23. What is the best anime fight scene?
- Hmm.. I haven't watched that many action animes. Can I pick Aomine and Kagami's zone battle from KnB season 2? :D
24. Who is your anime waifu?
- Maybe Sakura Chiyo form Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki-kun
25. Do any of my friends or family watches anime:
- My sis and brother do and some of my friend also c:
26. Do I listen to any anime music:
- Every character song and most soundtracks
27. Am I following any ongoing anime series:
- Kiseijuu and Ookami Shoujo to Kuro Ouji (This one is not even that great... It makes me angry every time I see the latest episode...)
28. Ever been to an anime club:
- Nope
29. Ever cried over an anime:
- Once?
30. My last anime wallpaper was:
- *cough* this one *chough

XXXIII

I was supposed to write about my trip to Sweden and Seremedy's last live since I'm on a holiday next week but I left my enxternal hard drive at home and all my pictures are there orz So I'm just giving you guys a check up about my blogging :'D I'm gonna write a long entry when I get back home!

~~~

I've been feeling quite blue today, not sure why. But because of that it has been a good day to listen to my fave singer's production since his voice makes me feel a little better ^-^ So I'm spending a little "Kim Jaejoong appreciation day", haha. Feel free to join me and listen all his best work:

My faves are I'll Protect You, Just Another Girl, Paradise, Kiss B, Coincidence and Only That is My World ^-^

XXXII

I really do suck at blogging regularly, don’t I… But settling down to a new city and school has taken a lot of my energy and time. I’m sorry ;-; But here I am, still alive!

The school has been great. I like the people and especially the atmosphere buuuuut unfortunately I’ve come to the conclusion that this is not what I want to do for my living. It’s fun and everything but I’m not even physically suitable for this kind of a job. I get migraine almost every day ‘cause I have to sit in the same position all day and stare at my screen in a very dim room and my back is killing me since I have scoliosis. I couldn’t possibly think that I would do this for years. I might have found myself a new career but we’ll see how that works~

~~~

My shy nature has given me some issues again. I’ve met some new awesome people but I still somehow get a little uneasy around them. I really thought I was past this, I really did. I thought that I had made some serious progress during the summer but looks like I was wrong.  I don’t know what I should do really.

~~~ 

Also I’m going to see Seremedy’s last live in Stockholm next Sunday. I’m so looking forward to it *-* I still can’t get my head around the fact that I’m actually going to see them irl, haha. Although, I’m feeling a little blue about the fact that this is the very last gig they’re very going to make together but I know it’ll be spectacular because of that ;w;

Also, can we talk about the fact how freaking hot everyone looks in this pic. Like, seriously. Especially Yohio and JENZiiH. My little heart can’t take this Q-Q

XXXI

I'm so sorry! I've been so busy and tired lately that I haven't had either time or energy to write a new entry ;-; I've been trying to adjust to my new school these past two weeks and it has taken all the energy out of me >-< And this is still not going to be a proper entry OTL I just wanted to keep you a little updated and I promise I'll write as soon as I've recharged my batteries a little. So take this not-so-interesting-nor-fun quiz for now~

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?
- My best friend propaply
2. Are you outgoing or shy?
- Shy
3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?
- My friends~
4. Are you easy to get along with?
- If you get me to talk, yes : D
5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?
- I don’t have someone I like
6. What kind of people are you attracted to?
- Outgoing, open, funny, people who use sarcasm, patient, not too childish
7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?
- Nope
8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?
- No one right now
9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?
- It depends. If we’re talking about sex in general then nope but if we’re talking about someone’s sex life then yes
10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?
- My best friend
11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?
- “Now I’m gonna hate you forever. Just kidding! XD It’s okay!” Oh my it looks horrible translated into English
12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?
- Back seat (JYJ), RED (Hyuna), Before my body is dry (from Kill la Kill), Just another girl (Kim Jaejoong) and Dear J (JYJ, Jaejoong solo)
13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?
- Not really, it gets my hair dirty more easily
14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?
- I think I do
15. What good thing happened this summer?
- I got my driver’s license
16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?
- I don’t think I have kissed anyone
17. Do you think there is life on other planets?
- There might be
18. Do you still talk to your first crush?
- My first proper crush? Haha, no
19. Do you like bubble baths?
- I do~
20. Do you like your neighbors?
- I haven’t really met any of them
21. What are your bad habits?
- Biting my nails (I don’t do it all the time tho) and that I always have to do something with my hands
22. Where would you like to travel?
- I want to go back to Japan but I also want to visit South Korea
23. Do you have trust issues?
- Not really
24. Favorite part of your daily routine?
- Listening to music while putting on my make-up and doing my hair
25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?
- Skin
26. What do you do when you wake up?
- Get my phone and starts getting through social media (another bad habit)
27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?
- It’s fine the way it is
28. Who are you most comfortable around?
- My siblings, parents and best friend
29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?
- Nope
30. Do you ever want to get married?
- Sure
31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail?
- Yup
32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?
- Oh my god, no
33. Spell your name with your chin.
- Nah
34. Do you play sports? What sports?
- Nope, me and sports don’t get along well… I suck at them. It would be nice to play baseball tho
35. Would you rather live without TV or music?
- TV!
36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?
- Yes
37. What do you say during awkward silences?
- Nothing really
38. Describe your dream girl/guy?
- I’ve done this plenty of times before
39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?
- Don’t really have favorites
40. What do you want to do after high school?
- Well I’ve already graduated and now I’m studying game development
41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?
- Mostly, yes
42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?
- It could mean many things
43. Do you smile at strangers?
- I do
44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?
- Neither!
45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?
- Umm… I have to eat, lawl
46. What are you paranoid about?
- That new people don’t like me
47. Have you ever been high?
- Nope
48. Have you ever been drunk?
- I don’t think so
49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?
- Yup
50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?
- Black
51. Ever wished you were someone else?
- Yes
52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?
- My shyness
53. Favourite makeup brand?
- Don’t have one
54. Favourite store?
- Still don’t have one
55. Favourite blog?
- Don’t have a fave :’D
56. Favourite colour?
Baby pink and baby blue
57. Favourite food?
- The chicken thing that my mom always makes. The recipe runs in my family ´u`
58. Last thing you ate?
- Moaom stripes candy, lemon flavor
59. First thing you ate this morning?
- Banana yogurt
60. Ever won a competition? For what?
- I don’t think I have
61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?
- Nope
62. Been arrested? For what?
- Nope
63. Ever been in love?
- Nope
64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?
- Haven’t had one
65. Are you hungry right now?
- A little
66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?
- I don’t have Tumblr friends ;-;
67. Facebook or Twitter?
- Facebook
68. Twitter or Tumblr?
- Tumblr
69. Are you watching tv right now?
- Nope
70. Names of your bestfriends?
- I don’t think they want me to share their names online
71. Craving something? What?
- Some junk food lol
72. What colour are your towels?
- Multicolor!
72. How many pillows do you sleep with?
- One or two
73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?
- Nope
74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?
- Too many to count
75. Favourite animal?
-
76. What colour is your underwear?
- Baby blue
77. Chocolate or Vanilla?
- In what? In ice cream, vanilla but in general choco
78. Favourite ice cream flavour?
- I’m really into pear this summer
79. What colour shirt are you wearing?
- Baby blue (matching with my undies lol)
80. What colour pants?
- Not wearing any
81. Favourite tv show?
- Suits or the Walking Dead
82. Favourite movie?
- Hachiko, maybe
83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?
- Neither
84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?
- Neither
85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?
- Haven’t watched it ;-;
86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?
- Nemo, probably
87. First person you talked to today?
- My sis
88. Last person you talked to today?
- Still my sis
89. Name a person you hate?
- I recently just got a person in my life who I hate. I’ve actually known him a pretty long time now but he made me hate himself just a while ago
90. Name a person you love?
- Mom
91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?
- Not really, I don’t believe in violence
92. In a fight with someone?
- Nope
93. How many sweatpants do you have?
- 2
94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?
- 4 or 5
95. Last movie you watched?
- Inception
96. Favourite actress?
- Jennifer Lawrence
97. Favourite actor?
- Gabriel Macht
98. Do you tan a lot?
- Not at all!
99. Have any pets?
- Nope. But my sis has a doggie and I’m living with her now c:
100. How are you feeling?
- A little tired and hungry
101. Do you type fast?
- Kinda
102. Do you regret anything from your past?
- Some things
103. Can you spell well?
- Yup
104. Do you miss anyone from your past?
. Yes
105. Ever been to a bonfire party?
- Nope
106. Ever broken someone’s heart?
- I hope I haven’t
107. Have you ever been on a horse?
- Nope
108. What should you be doing?
- Going to sleep
109. Is something irritating you right now?
- Not really
110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?
- Yes
111. Do you have trust issues?
- Wasn’t this already asked before?
112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?
- My mom?
113. What was your childhood nickname?
- I don’t want to say since I’d have to reveal my real name
114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?
- Yes
115. Do you play the Wii?
- Yes
116. Are you listening to music right now?
- Nope
117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?
- It’s okay
118. Do you like Chinese food?
- Yup
119. Favourite book?
- Norwegian Wood
120. Are you afraid of the dark?
- Yup
121. Are you mean?
- Nope
122. Is cheating ever okay?
- No
123. Can you keep white shoes clean?
- Not really :’D
124. Do you believe in love at first sight?
- I don’t think it would be true love
125. Do you believe in true love?
- Yes
126. Are you currently bored?
- A little
127. What makes you happy?
- Good company
128. Would you change your name?
- Nah, I kinda like mine
129. What your zodiac sign?
Libra
130. Do you like subway?
- It’s okay
131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?
- Find out about my own feelings and then decide what we’re gonna do about it
132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?
- This was already asked!
133. Favourite lyrics right now?
- Prophet in Disguise (YOHIO)
134. Can you count to one million?
- Yes?
135. Dumbest lie you ever told?
- Probably something I told as a child
136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?
- Right now open cause we have to let the dog get around the house
137. How tall are you?
- 165cm
138. Curly or Straight hair?
- Mine straight but I prefer curly
139. Brunette or Blonde?
- I’m blonde but then again, I prefer brunette :’D
140. Summer or Winter?
- Ummm summer?
141. Night or Day?
- Night
142. Favourite month?
- September or April
143. Are you a vegetarian?
- Nope
144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?
- Milk!
145. Tea or Coffee?
- Tea
146. Was today a good day?
- It was tiresome! Didn’t sleep that well
147. Mars or Snickers?
- Snickers
148. What’s your favourite quote?
- “So my dream isn’t to become the best, it’s to become one who I’m not ashamed to be”(Key from SHINee)
149. Do you believe in ghosts?
- Not sure, maybe
150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?
- “A pair of jeans with a leather belt, a pair of flip-flops, a Winter Park High School Wildcats baseball cap and a baby blue polo shirt.

M~

XXX

You can kinda see that blogging hasn't been my main priority right now. But I've been busy! Soo let me tell you about all the things that have happened in this past month c:

I spent some time with my relatives in Middle-Finland 'cause I haven't really got time to do that since school has kept me busy. But there was also an anime convention where I was doing volunteer work so I had to go there anyways~ To be honest, I didn't enjoy this year's Animecon that much, something just wasn't right. Our schedule failed miserably and we only got to see two programs though we were supposed to go to see eight. They were either full or the lecture's that we were listening went over time and we couldn't get in to the next ones. But still the programs that we saw were great! There was an lecture about DRAMAtical Murder's character's psychological issues and an anime concert which was played by an real orchestra. There was also a visiting opera singer which made the concert even more amazing *-* I got chills all the way through the show and almost shed a few tears when they were playing Legend comes to Life from Pokémon ;w; Here's a clip if you're interested!

My badge for the weekend! I had to blurr my real name though :'D

Creepy hallway, yay! This was at the accommodation and if you wanted to take a shower, you had to walk at the very end of it

But well yeah, me and my friend were working at the accommodation during the night between Saturday and Sunday. Our shift started at midnight and ended at 6AM. The shift itself wasn't that bad, in fact it was actually pretty fun but oh my did I feel awful when we went to sleep in the morning :'D I can honestly say that I've never felt that bad and I've stayed up for more than 36 hours before. I felt like dying and my friend wasn't that great either so we decided to skip the last day in the convention and head to pick up my mom from my aunt's and head back home. It was a long 5 hours in the car but we made it back and after a good night sleep I was fine again~

From our shift~ The sun began to rise

~~~

On our trip to Middle-Finland I went to sign my rental contract and now me and my sister finally have a place for us when our school starts next month! c: I'm actually moving this weekend so I've been busy packing and meeting up with my friends for the last time ;-; Well I know I still get to see them but it's not easy to use public transport to get here. But luckily there's the internet!

Oh yeah, my friends were thinking what we should do together before I leave and they decided that we were going to see an abandoned mental hospital. Like really? This is how you're gonna say goodbye to me :'D It was 1 in the morning when we arrived there and before that I never thought what kind of a wimp I am in those kinds of situations but man... Let's just say that I never wanna go there again :'D Like the creepy hospital and all the manor houses surrounding it weren't bad enough, I was freaked out by a person who was standing on the road that lead to one of the manors (there are still living there so yes, it was a real person :'D). And here I thought that all those horror movies and games had made me a braver person but nope! A total wuss :'D

~~~

I also spent a night at my friend's cabin where we went to mow the lawn before~ It was great! We did some BBQ, went to swim and spent a night chatting about life ´u` A proper quality time with each other~

BBQ in the rain, yay!

Yellow watermelon o-o

~~~

I've started to follow five new animes that began this month and oh my do I have a busy schedule now x.x I still have Haikyuu!! from before and I still haven't finished DMMd re:connect orz So far I've been pleased to almost every one of these animes. Aoharaido has been amazing and so does Kuroshitsuji ~the Book of Circus~, Love Stage! and Free! Eternal Summer have been okay but I'm not that keen on them so it's alright but oh my god the anime adaption of DRAMAtical Murder... I seriously almost started crying when I watch the first two episodes, so bad. You can clearly see that they've a ridiculously low budget when they're making it and I'm surprised to see that it look like people don't care that much about it and still are saying that it's awesome. No it's not! Aoba sit derping in every god damn frame when it's not a close up of him and the animation is so stiff. And they've even used the pictures from the game in their animation, like seriously? =__=  I know that Studio DEEN isn't really that great studio but still, have at least some quality in your animes! And oh my how can you accidentally release a beta version of an episode? Who does that  щ(ಥДಥщ) Luckily it was just a beta since I was shocked when I was the latest episode... I mean if Aoba is supposed to look like this and then he suddenly looks like this and this I thought that the studio was just messing with us and thought that we would enjoy everything they made at least it included the DMMd characters... And when Aobas hair and clothes' color changes in the middle of a scene? Oh my.... But one thing I've noticed! The studio must really love Koujaku since there hasn't been a single derp frame of him yet. Not that I'm complaining ´u`

But that's what I've been doing these past weeks! Now I'm getting back to packing and starting to get ready to move out~

With love,
Miki ♥