XXXVI

I wanted to make a thank you entry for a certain person. Thanking him for the past year. It has been amazing and I've learned so much thanks to him. I've learned how to face any hardships I have on my way and to believe in myself when no one else does. I believe that I can achieve almost anything I want in this life if I just have the courage to go for it. I've learned that there's no one who can tell me how to live my life or who I should be. I've learned to hold my head up high but at the same time have a respect for others. I've learned that we're all here to write our own stories and no one else can write it for us. I've also learned to question things in life that I've never even thought before. I've learned that I want to make a change in the world before my time here on Earth is over, even though it would be only a tiny one.

So thank you Yohio. I'm not sure if you'll ever read this but I still wanted to write you this message. Please have an amazing year of 2015 and I promise I'll support you as long as I can.

Show me that your smile can change the world we live in [Ssource]

XXXV

Bold what you've done:

Appearance
I had piercings besides the ears
I want piercings besides the ears
I have a scar
I tan easily
I wish my hair was a different color
I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color
I want a tattoo
I can be self-conscious about my appearance
I have/had braces
I have more than two piercings

Embarrassment
Disney movies still make me cry sometimes
I’ve laughed so hard I’ve cried
I’ve glued my hand to something
I’ve laughed until some kind of beverage came out of my nose
I’ve had my pants rip in public
I’ve touched something sharp/hot/etc to see if it would hurt



Health
I’ve gotten stitches
I’ve broken or dislocated a bone
I’ve had my tonsils removed
I’ve had my wisdom teeth removed
I’ve had chicken pox

Travel
I’ve been to Florida
I’ve driven/ridden over 200 miles in one day
I’ve been on a plane
I’ve been to California
I’ve been to Asia.
I’ve been to Niagara Falls.
I’ve been to Vanuatu or the Mystery Islands
I’ve been to the Caribbean
I’ve been to Europe

Experiences
I’ve gotten lost in my city
I’ve seen a shooting star
I’ve wished on a shooting star
I’ve seen a meteor shower
I’ve gone out in public in my pajamas
I’ve pushed all the buttons on an elevator
I’ve slapped someone
I’ve kissed someone underwater
I’ve chugged something
I’ve crashed a car
I’ve been skiing
I’ve been in a musical
I’ve auditioned for something
I’ve been on stage
I’ve caught a snowflake on my tongue
I’ve sat on a rooftop at night
I’ve pranked someone
I’ve ridden in a taxi

Honesty / Crime
I’ve been threatened to be arrested.
I’ve done something I promised someone I wouldn’t
I’ve snuck out
I’ve lied about my whereabouts
I’ve cheated while playing a game
I’ve been in a fist fight

Death
I’m afraid of dying
I hate funerals
I’ve seen someone/something die
Someone I know has attempted/committed suicide

Materialism
I own over 5 rap CD’s
I’m obsessed with anime/manga
I collected comic books
I own a lot of makeup
I own something from Pac Sun
I own something from The Gap
I own something I got on E-Bay
I own something from Abercrombie
I thrive on compliments
I thrive on hate

Random
I can sing low key
I’ve stolen a tray from a fast food restaurant
I open up to others easily
I watch the news occasionally or always
I don’t like to kill bugs
I sing in the shower
I’m a morning person
I’m a sports fanatic
I twirl my hair
I care about grammar
I love to spam friends
I’ve copied more than 30 CD’s in a day.
I bake well
I would wear pajamas to school
I like Martha Stewart
I laugh at my own jokes
I eat fast food weekly
I’ve not turned something in and still got an A in a certain class
I can’t sleep if there’s a spider in the room
I’m really ticklish
I like white chocolate
I bite/used to bite my nails
I’m good at remembering names
I’m good at remembering dates
I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life

People
..used to ask if I was anorexic/bulimic
..have called me fat
..have said I’m skinny
..have said I’m ugly
..have said I’m pretty
..have spread rumors about me
..forced me to eat
..say I eat too much
..say I eat too little

Eating
I’ve lost weight quickly
I’ve gained weight quickly
I’m at my thinnest
I’m at my biggest
I’ve lost weight and kept it off
I’ve lost weight, but gained it back
My weight affects my mood
I diet
I’m vegan/vegetarian. not quite, but I don’t like meat much
I exercise
I’ve fainted from exhaustion

Family
I’ve sworn at my parents
I’ve planned to run away from home before
I’ve run away from home
I have a sibling less than one year old
I want kids in the future
I’ve had kids
I’ve lost a child

Relationships
I’m engaged
I’m married
I’m single
I’ve gone on a blind date
I have/had a friend with benefits
I miss someone right now
I have a fear of abandonment
I’ve gotten divorced.
I’ve had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back
Someone has/had feelings for me when I didn’t have them back
I’ve told someone I loved them when I didn’t
I’ve told someone I didn’t love them when I did
I’m a cuddler
I’ve been kissed in the rain
I’ve hugged a stranger
I’ve kissed a stranger

Bad times
I regularly drink
I can’t swallow pills
I can swallow numerous pills at a time without difficulty
I’ve been diagnosed with depression at some point
I have/had anxiety problems.
I shut others out when I’m upset.
I don’t have anyone to talk to when I’m upset about something personal
I have taken/take anti-depressants.
I’ve slept an entire day before
I’ve plotted revenge

XXXIV

I remembered I have a blog! Sorry I haven't been able to make new entries, been super busy ;-; I try to write something more interesting next time!

30 anime related questions!

1. My first anime:
- DN Angel
2. My favorite anime:
- Kuroko no Basuke ´u`
3. The first anime character I was obsessed with:
...probably Sasuke... OTL But I'm not sure what you mean with obsessed D: Since Sasuke was the first chara I liked very much but Sebastian (from Kuroshitsuji) was first chara whose merchandise I bought...
4. My anime OTP:
- AoKaga! (Aomine and Kagami from Kuroko no Basuke)
5. An anime I can’t stand:
- Rurouni Kenshin... I watched 27 episodes of it and it was just horrible
6. An anime I want to watch:
- Right now Hyouka, Mushishi, Shirobako, Tokyo Ghoul, Sakurasou no Pet na Kanojo and Kuroshitsuji: Book of Murder are on my plan to watch list
7. An anime I never finished:
- Naruto, Naruto Shippuuden and Rurouni Kensin ::D
8. The most recent anime I finished:
- Haikyuu!!
9. An anime I never thought of watching but fell in love with:
- Kuroko no Basuke :b
10. My favorite genre of Anime:
- Sports or shoujo?
11. Shounen or Shoujo:
- Shoujo
12. My favorite anime character of all time:
- Sebastian from Kuroshitsuji c: Or Kagami Taiga from Kuroko no Basuke
13. An anime that I introduced to a friend:
- Toradora, Free!, Death Note, Suki na Mono wa Suki Dakara Shou ga Nai!, Shiki, Kuroshitsuji and Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki-kun
14. The anime(s) that I am currently watching:
- Ao Haru Ride, Kill la Kill, Kiseijuu and Ookami Shoujo to Kuro Ouji
15. An anime that never gets old no matter how many times I watch it:
- Kuroko no Basuke and Kaichou wa Maid-Sama!
16. Do I own any anime merchandise:
- Do I? (That pic is few years old so...)
17. Yaoi or Yuri:
- Yaoi all the way!
18. If I’ve ever been to an anime convention:
- Animecon/Finncon 2009,2011, Animecon 2012,2013,2014, Desucon 2011,2012,2013,2014, Desucon Frostbite 2013,2014 and Chibicon 2014
19. Who is my favorite anime voice actor:
- Daisuke Ono!
20. Sub or Dub?
- Sub ò-ó Who can watch anime that's dubbed ugh...
21. If I could have any anime character’s hair style, who would it be:
- Momoi's from Kuroko no Basuke? I don't know D:
22. Manga or Anime?
- Anime
23. What is the best anime fight scene?
- Hmm.. I haven't watched that many action animes. Can I pick Aomine and Kagami's zone battle from KnB season 2? :D
24. Who is your anime waifu?
- Maybe Sakura Chiyo form Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki-kun
25. Do any of my friends or family watches anime:
- My sis and brother do and some of my friend also c:
26. Do I listen to any anime music:
- Every character song and most soundtracks
27. Am I following any ongoing anime series:
- Kiseijuu and Ookami Shoujo to Kuro Ouji (This one is not even that great... It makes me angry every time I see the latest episode...)
28. Ever been to an anime club:
- Nope
29. Ever cried over an anime:
- Once?
30. My last anime wallpaper was:
- *cough* this one *chough

XXXIII

I was supposed to write about my trip to Sweden and Seremedy's last live since I'm on a holiday next week but I left my enxternal hard drive at home and all my pictures are there orz So I'm just giving you guys a check up about my blogging :'D I'm gonna write a long entry when I get back home!

~~~

I've been feeling quite blue today, not sure why. But because of that it has been a good day to listen to my fave singer's production since his voice makes me feel a little better ^-^ So I'm spending a little "Kim Jaejoong appreciation day", haha. Feel free to join me and listen all his best work:

My faves are I'll Protect You, Just Another Girl, Paradise, Kiss B, Coincidence and Only That is My World ^-^

XXXII

I really do suck at blogging regularly, don’t I… But settling down to a new city and school has taken a lot of my energy and time. I’m sorry ;-; But here I am, still alive!

The school has been great. I like the people and especially the atmosphere buuuuut unfortunately I’ve come to the conclusion that this is not what I want to do for my living. It’s fun and everything but I’m not even physically suitable for this kind of a job. I get migraine almost every day ‘cause I have to sit in the same position all day and stare at my screen in a very dim room and my back is killing me since I have scoliosis. I couldn’t possibly think that I would do this for years. I might have found myself a new career but we’ll see how that works~

~~~

My shy nature has given me some issues again. I’ve met some new awesome people but I still somehow get a little uneasy around them. I really thought I was past this, I really did. I thought that I had made some serious progress during the summer but looks like I was wrong.  I don’t know what I should do really.

~~~ 

Also I’m going to see Seremedy’s last live in Stockholm next Sunday. I’m so looking forward to it *-* I still can’t get my head around the fact that I’m actually going to see them irl, haha. Although, I’m feeling a little blue about the fact that this is the very last gig they’re very going to make together but I know it’ll be spectacular because of that ;w;

Also, can we talk about the fact how freaking hot everyone looks in this pic. Like, seriously. Especially Yohio and JENZiiH. My little heart can’t take this Q-Q

XXXI

I'm so sorry! I've been so busy and tired lately that I haven't had either time or energy to write a new entry ;-; I've been trying to adjust to my new school these past two weeks and it has taken all the energy out of me >-< And this is still not going to be a proper entry OTL I just wanted to keep you a little updated and I promise I'll write as soon as I've recharged my batteries a little. So take this not-so-interesting-nor-fun quiz for now~

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?
- My best friend propaply
2. Are you outgoing or shy?
- Shy
3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?
- My friends~
4. Are you easy to get along with?
- If you get me to talk, yes : D
5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?
- I don’t have someone I like
6. What kind of people are you attracted to?
- Outgoing, open, funny, people who use sarcasm, patient, not too childish
7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?
- Nope
8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?
- No one right now
9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?
- It depends. If we’re talking about sex in general then nope but if we’re talking about someone’s sex life then yes
10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?
- My best friend
11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?
- “Now I’m gonna hate you forever. Just kidding! XD It’s okay!” Oh my it looks horrible translated into English
12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?
- Back seat (JYJ), RED (Hyuna), Before my body is dry (from Kill la Kill), Just another girl (Kim Jaejoong) and Dear J (JYJ, Jaejoong solo)
13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?
- Not really, it gets my hair dirty more easily
14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?
- I think I do
15. What good thing happened this summer?
- I got my driver’s license
16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?
- I don’t think I have kissed anyone
17. Do you think there is life on other planets?
- There might be
18. Do you still talk to your first crush?
- My first proper crush? Haha, no
19. Do you like bubble baths?
- I do~
20. Do you like your neighbors?
- I haven’t really met any of them
21. What are your bad habits?
- Biting my nails (I don’t do it all the time tho) and that I always have to do something with my hands
22. Where would you like to travel?
- I want to go back to Japan but I also want to visit South Korea
23. Do you have trust issues?
- Not really
24. Favorite part of your daily routine?
- Listening to music while putting on my make-up and doing my hair
25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?
- Skin
26. What do you do when you wake up?
- Get my phone and starts getting through social media (another bad habit)
27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?
- It’s fine the way it is
28. Who are you most comfortable around?
- My siblings, parents and best friend
29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?
- Nope
30. Do you ever want to get married?
- Sure
31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail?
- Yup
32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?
- Oh my god, no
33. Spell your name with your chin.
- Nah
34. Do you play sports? What sports?
- Nope, me and sports don’t get along well… I suck at them. It would be nice to play baseball tho
35. Would you rather live without TV or music?
- TV!
36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?
- Yes
37. What do you say during awkward silences?
- Nothing really
38. Describe your dream girl/guy?
- I’ve done this plenty of times before
39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?
- Don’t really have favorites
40. What do you want to do after high school?
- Well I’ve already graduated and now I’m studying game development
41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?
- Mostly, yes
42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?
- It could mean many things
43. Do you smile at strangers?
- I do
44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?
- Neither!
45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?
- Umm… I have to eat, lawl
46. What are you paranoid about?
- That new people don’t like me
47. Have you ever been high?
- Nope
48. Have you ever been drunk?
- I don’t think so
49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?
- Yup
50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?
- Black
51. Ever wished you were someone else?
- Yes
52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?
- My shyness
53. Favourite makeup brand?
- Don’t have one
54. Favourite store?
- Still don’t have one
55. Favourite blog?
- Don’t have a fave :’D
56. Favourite colour?
Baby pink and baby blue
57. Favourite food?
- The chicken thing that my mom always makes. The recipe runs in my family ´u`
58. Last thing you ate?
- Moaom stripes candy, lemon flavor
59. First thing you ate this morning?
- Banana yogurt
60. Ever won a competition? For what?
- I don’t think I have
61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?
- Nope
62. Been arrested? For what?
- Nope
63. Ever been in love?
- Nope
64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?
- Haven’t had one
65. Are you hungry right now?
- A little
66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?
- I don’t have Tumblr friends ;-;
67. Facebook or Twitter?
- Facebook
68. Twitter or Tumblr?
- Tumblr
69. Are you watching tv right now?
- Nope
70. Names of your bestfriends?
- I don’t think they want me to share their names online
71. Craving something? What?
- Some junk food lol
72. What colour are your towels?
- Multicolor!
72. How many pillows do you sleep with?
- One or two
73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?
- Nope
74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?
- Too many to count
75. Favourite animal?
-
76. What colour is your underwear?
- Baby blue
77. Chocolate or Vanilla?
- In what? In ice cream, vanilla but in general choco
78. Favourite ice cream flavour?
- I’m really into pear this summer
79. What colour shirt are you wearing?
- Baby blue (matching with my undies lol)
80. What colour pants?
- Not wearing any
81. Favourite tv show?
- Suits or the Walking Dead
82. Favourite movie?
- Hachiko, maybe
83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?
- Neither
84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?
- Neither
85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?
- Haven’t watched it ;-;
86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?
- Nemo, probably
87. First person you talked to today?
- My sis
88. Last person you talked to today?
- Still my sis
89. Name a person you hate?
- I recently just got a person in my life who I hate. I’ve actually known him a pretty long time now but he made me hate himself just a while ago
90. Name a person you love?
- Mom
91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?
- Not really, I don’t believe in violence
92. In a fight with someone?
- Nope
93. How many sweatpants do you have?
- 2
94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?
- 4 or 5
95. Last movie you watched?
- Inception
96. Favourite actress?
- Jennifer Lawrence
97. Favourite actor?
- Gabriel Macht
98. Do you tan a lot?
- Not at all!
99. Have any pets?
- Nope. But my sis has a doggie and I’m living with her now c:
100. How are you feeling?
- A little tired and hungry
101. Do you type fast?
- Kinda
102. Do you regret anything from your past?
- Some things
103. Can you spell well?
- Yup
104. Do you miss anyone from your past?
. Yes
105. Ever been to a bonfire party?
- Nope
106. Ever broken someone’s heart?
- I hope I haven’t
107. Have you ever been on a horse?
- Nope
108. What should you be doing?
- Going to sleep
109. Is something irritating you right now?
- Not really
110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?
- Yes
111. Do you have trust issues?
- Wasn’t this already asked before?
112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?
- My mom?
113. What was your childhood nickname?
- I don’t want to say since I’d have to reveal my real name
114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?
- Yes
115. Do you play the Wii?
- Yes
116. Are you listening to music right now?
- Nope
117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?
- It’s okay
118. Do you like Chinese food?
- Yup
119. Favourite book?
- Norwegian Wood
120. Are you afraid of the dark?
- Yup
121. Are you mean?
- Nope
122. Is cheating ever okay?
- No
123. Can you keep white shoes clean?
- Not really :’D
124. Do you believe in love at first sight?
- I don’t think it would be true love
125. Do you believe in true love?
- Yes
126. Are you currently bored?
- A little
127. What makes you happy?
- Good company
128. Would you change your name?
- Nah, I kinda like mine
129. What your zodiac sign?
Libra
130. Do you like subway?
- It’s okay
131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?
- Find out about my own feelings and then decide what we’re gonna do about it
132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?
- This was already asked!
133. Favourite lyrics right now?
- Prophet in Disguise (YOHIO)
134. Can you count to one million?
- Yes?
135. Dumbest lie you ever told?
- Probably something I told as a child
136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?
- Right now open cause we have to let the dog get around the house
137. How tall are you?
- 165cm
138. Curly or Straight hair?
- Mine straight but I prefer curly
139. Brunette or Blonde?
- I’m blonde but then again, I prefer brunette :’D
140. Summer or Winter?
- Ummm summer?
141. Night or Day?
- Night
142. Favourite month?
- September or April
143. Are you a vegetarian?
- Nope
144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?
- Milk!
145. Tea or Coffee?
- Tea
146. Was today a good day?
- It was tiresome! Didn’t sleep that well
147. Mars or Snickers?
- Snickers
148. What’s your favourite quote?
- “So my dream isn’t to become the best, it’s to become one who I’m not ashamed to be”(Key from SHINee)
149. Do you believe in ghosts?
- Not sure, maybe
150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?
- “A pair of jeans with a leather belt, a pair of flip-flops, a Winter Park High School Wildcats baseball cap and a baby blue polo shirt.

M~

XXX

You can kinda see that blogging hasn't been my main priority right now. But I've been busy! Soo let me tell you about all the things that have happened in this past month c:

I spent some time with my relatives in Middle-Finland 'cause I haven't really got time to do that since school has kept me busy. But there was also an anime convention where I was doing volunteer work so I had to go there anyways~ To be honest, I didn't enjoy this year's Animecon that much, something just wasn't right. Our schedule failed miserably and we only got to see two programs though we were supposed to go to see eight. They were either full or the lecture's that we were listening went over time and we couldn't get in to the next ones. But still the programs that we saw were great! There was an lecture about DRAMAtical Murder's character's psychological issues and an anime concert which was played by an real orchestra. There was also a visiting opera singer which made the concert even more amazing *-* I got chills all the way through the show and almost shed a few tears when they were playing Legend comes to Life from Pokémon ;w; Here's a clip if you're interested!

My badge for the weekend! I had to blurr my real name though :'D

Creepy hallway, yay! This was at the accommodation and if you wanted to take a shower, you had to walk at the very end of it

But well yeah, me and my friend were working at the accommodation during the night between Saturday and Sunday. Our shift started at midnight and ended at 6AM. The shift itself wasn't that bad, in fact it was actually pretty fun but oh my did I feel awful when we went to sleep in the morning :'D I can honestly say that I've never felt that bad and I've stayed up for more than 36 hours before. I felt like dying and my friend wasn't that great either so we decided to skip the last day in the convention and head to pick up my mom from my aunt's and head back home. It was a long 5 hours in the car but we made it back and after a good night sleep I was fine again~

From our shift~ The sun began to rise

~~~

On our trip to Middle-Finland I went to sign my rental contract and now me and my sister finally have a place for us when our school starts next month! c: I'm actually moving this weekend so I've been busy packing and meeting up with my friends for the last time ;-; Well I know I still get to see them but it's not easy to use public transport to get here. But luckily there's the internet!

Oh yeah, my friends were thinking what we should do together before I leave and they decided that we were going to see an abandoned mental hospital. Like really? This is how you're gonna say goodbye to me :'D It was 1 in the morning when we arrived there and before that I never thought what kind of a wimp I am in those kinds of situations but man... Let's just say that I never wanna go there again :'D Like the creepy hospital and all the manor houses surrounding it weren't bad enough, I was freaked out by a person who was standing on the road that lead to one of the manors (there are still living there so yes, it was a real person :'D). And here I thought that all those horror movies and games had made me a braver person but nope! A total wuss :'D

~~~

I also spent a night at my friend's cabin where we went to mow the lawn before~ It was great! We did some BBQ, went to swim and spent a night chatting about life ´u` A proper quality time with each other~

BBQ in the rain, yay!

Yellow watermelon o-o

~~~

I've started to follow five new animes that began this month and oh my do I have a busy schedule now x.x I still have Haikyuu!! from before and I still haven't finished DMMd re:connect orz So far I've been pleased to almost every one of these animes. Aoharaido has been amazing and so does Kuroshitsuji ~the Book of Circus~, Love Stage! and Free! Eternal Summer have been okay but I'm not that keen on them so it's alright but oh my god the anime adaption of DRAMAtical Murder... I seriously almost started crying when I watch the first two episodes, so bad. You can clearly see that they've a ridiculously low budget when they're making it and I'm surprised to see that it look like people don't care that much about it and still are saying that it's awesome. No it's not! Aoba sit derping in every god damn frame when it's not a close up of him and the animation is so stiff. And they've even used the pictures from the game in their animation, like seriously? =__=  I know that Studio DEEN isn't really that great studio but still, have at least some quality in your animes! And oh my how can you accidentally release a beta version of an episode? Who does that  щ(ಥДಥщ) Luckily it was just a beta since I was shocked when I was the latest episode... I mean if Aoba is supposed to look like this and then he suddenly looks like this and this I thought that the studio was just messing with us and thought that we would enjoy everything they made at least it included the DMMd characters... And when Aobas hair and clothes' color changes in the middle of a scene? Oh my.... But one thing I've noticed! The studio must really love Koujaku since there hasn't been a single derp frame of him yet. Not that I'm complaining ´u`

But that's what I've been doing these past weeks! Now I'm getting back to packing and starting to get ready to move out~

With love,
Miki ♥

XXIX

Two entries in one day what!

Since the start of 2014 I have:

Gotten a new piercing.
Dyed my hair.
Ended a relationship.
Started a new relationship.
Been on a long car journey.
Passed an exam.
Cried on someone’s shoulder.
Had a massive fight with a boyfriend/girlfriend.
Received flowers.
Had a Valentine.
Written a letter using pen and paper.
Gone to see a therapist.
Been prescribed medication by a doctor.
Read a really good book.
Gone to the zoo.
Spent too much money on unnecessary things.
Travelled by train.
Cried over someone.
Spent a day out in the sun getting a tan.
Slammed a door out of frustration.
Had an anxiety attack.
Had a BBQ.
Gone to the fair.
Gone bowling.
Seen a film at the cinema in 3D.
Gone on a date.
Helped someone home after they’d had too much to drink.
Stayed up all night.
Talked on the phone for over 2 hours. 
Supported someone who’d received bad news.
Watched some kind of live sporting event.
Read an entire book in one day.
Bought a DVD the day it was released.
Eaten McDonald’s more than four times in a single week.
Cried as a result of exam stress.
Met some incredible new people.
Fallen backwards off a chair.
Broken my glasses.
Cried over someone in my past.
Spent hours aimlessly browsing the internet.
Thrown up.
Cried over a film.
Gone out of my way to avoid an ex-significant other.
Fought with someone in public.
Been in a relationship for a year or longer.

XXVIII

1. What is your #1 favorite anime?
- Kuroko no Basuke
2. Has an anime ever made you cry?
- Yesh! Death Note. Everyone who has seen it knows the episode I’m talking about~
3. Which anime made you laugh the hardest?
- Hmm… There are plenty of those but the one I can remember is Watamote!
4. If you could make a spin-off of any anime, what would it be?
- Anything from Kuroko no Basuke is fine!
5. List your top [5] anime's
- Kuroko no Basuke, Kaichou wa Maid-sama!, Kuroshitsuji, Death Note and Toradora!
6. List your top [5] anime OSTs
- Umm… These are not in any particular order; Kuroko no Basuke, Higurashi no Naku Koro ni, Death Note, Kill la Kill and…. I don’t know! :’D
7. Have you ever watched an entire anime in one sitting?
- Yeah I have! Plenty!
8. Who is your favorite anime character?
- Oaaaa maybe Kuroko? I’m not sure ;-; I can’t pick just one!
9. Name an anime character you absolutely hate
- Himuro from Kuroko… I just… Can’t… Ugh….
10. Which [3] animes would you most recommend?
- Death Note, Kuroko no Basuke and… Toradora!
11. What is your favorite 'moe' anime?
- K-on?
12. What is your favorite romance anime?
- Toradora
13. What is your favorite comedy anime?
- Ouran High School Host Club
14. What is your favorite action anime?
- D.Gray-Man
15. What is your favorite harem anime?
- Only harem anime I’ve watched is Rosario to Vampire but it sucked so….
16. What is your favorite ecchi anime?
- Elfen Lied? Not that into ecchi either
17. What is your favorite mech anime?
- Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann~
18. What is your favorite drama anime?
- Haven’t watched any!
19. What is your favorite slice of life anime?
- Kuroko~
20. What is your favorite adventure anime?
- One Piece, maybe?
21. What is the first anime you ever saw?
- Technically it’s either The Moomins or Pokémon but the first one that I recognized as anime was D.N. Angel!
22. You get to have a harem of [6] anime characters of your choice, who do you choose?
- Huehuehue~ Ryuuji Takasu (Toradora!), Kagami Taiga (Kuroko), Kiyoshi Teppei (Kuroko), Usui Takumi (KWMS), Kazehaya Shouta (Kimi ni Todoke) and Koujaku (DRAMAtical Murder)
23. What is the most times you've re-watched an anime?
- 3, I think
24. Name [1] anime you wish everyone would watch
- Death Note!
25. What is an anime you regret watching?
- This Ugly Yet Beautiful World, oh god….
26. You get to have [1] anime character as your waifu/husbando in real life, who do you choose?
- I have three choices: Kiyoshi Teppei (Kuroko), Ryuuji Takasu (Toradora!) or Kagami Taiga (Kuroko)!
27. Which anime character are you most like?
- Ryuuji Takasu, we have exactly the same personalities :B
28. Do you watch a new anime because you think it will be good, or because its popular?
- ‘Cause I think it’ll be good.
29. Has an anime's fanbase ever made you hesitant to watch an anime?
- I don’t want to watch Shingeki no Kyojin ‘cause it’s so hyped right now. I see it everywhere in anime conventions and online so the fanbase has kinda made too hyped for me :b I’ll watch it someday but not in a while
30. How many anime episodes is 'ideal' for you?
- 25? It’s not too long but not too short either. I think animes that have only 13 have too fast pace and they skip stuff or just quickly try to get pass things to get to the next thing
31. Have you ever watched an anime with over [23] episodes?
- I have, 16 actually :’D But many of those are animes that have 25-26 episode so I’m not sure if they count. But there’s still D.Gray-Man [103], Suhgo Chara! and Shugo Chara!! Doki [51 Both], Death Note [37] and Hetalia [52]. And animes that I’ve watched more than 23 episodes but dropped are Naruto [50], Rurouni Kenshin [27] and Soul Eater [33, planning on finishing this one]
32. If you could make a game for an anime of your choice, what would it be and why?
- You know those anime dating games? Yeah, I want one from Kuroko :’D I _need_ it
33. Would you ever watch an anime with over [100] episodes?
- Well I have already :’D D.Gray-Man, as I mentioned before. And I would do it again if the anime would be interesting enough! (I’m gonna catch up with One Piece!)
34. Have you ever watched an anime only because you liked a specific character?
- Let me think… Maybe Shugo Chara? It was totally not my type but I liked Ikuto so I just kept watching it
35. Have you ever dropped an anime, if so why?
- Yes I have! Rurouni Kenshin ‘cause oh my god it was so boring… I don’t know how I managed to watch it so long… And then there’s Naruto, both the original and Shippuuden. I’ve read it more than 500 chapters and somehow I just preferred the manga more so I just stopped watching the anime :b
36. In your opinion, what makes a good anime?
- I’m sucker for voice actors so they have to be good! I also like main characters with weird features. Like Haru’s obsession with water in Free! But of course there has to be a good plot and not too many clichés~
37. Name a popular anime you love
- Kuroko no Basuke!
38. Name a popular anime you hate
- Naruto :D
39. Is there an anime you wish was more popular?
- Not really. I like to keep my faves for myself huehuehue~
40. Thoughts on live-action adaptations?
They can be good or horrible, there’s no between. Luckily I’ve only seen good ones!

XXVI

 Hmmm what was the last thing I wrote about... It's so long ago I can't even remember myself :'D But yeah I'm back! Been kinda busy even thou I haven't had anything special to do. But I still have some news!

So as we all already know I graduated from high school. Because of that I had to find myself a new school, something where I could get an occupation. I don't actually know what I want to do with my life yet so picking a school was hard for me. But I've always been interested in games and designing so I decided to apply for this vocational school in middle Finland where you can study for a game developer and map/character designer. I never actually thought I could get in since basically everyone wants to be in the gaming industry nowadays and there were more than 100 applicants for this school and I knew they wold only take few in every year.

But I got in. And it wasn't even a close call since the lowest points from the entrance exam they accepted was 5,25 and I got 7,25. I actually made it... And I wasn't the only one! My sister applied for the same school also and she got in too :'D It feel unbelievable that we both made it but now we're moving together to this tiny village in the middle of nowhere in fall~ We actually already got an apartment for ourselves n___n Now I'll just have to start packing~

I still don't know if this is what I want to do but hey! I don't have to be there if I don't like it. And I'll never know if this is what I've been looking for if I don't try *-*

~~~

So I found out about my acceptance two weeks ago and I went kinda celebrate it with my friends ^-^ We went to glow bowling and after that we went to the field next to airport to watch some airplanes. It was so pretty~ Perfect spot to take a girl for a date, with a blanket and  picnic supplies *wink wink* heh...

The plains where so close *-* (Sorry about the quality, I only had my phone with me)

The following day we went to my friend's family's cabin to mow the lawn >'D It was pretty funny! First time I've ever mowed with the lawnmower that you actually have to drive~ And then we went to have ice cream *-* My first ice cream this summer! It was great n___n The whole day was awesome~

We did great job, didn't we? *-*

~~~

Also I finally found out that I got accepted as a volunteer worker for this anime convention here in Finland called Animecon on July! I'm gonna be working at the accommodation with my friend~ Gonna make sure people be quiet during the night and stuff :B I'm gonna be working from 12 am to 6 am so it's gonna be a long weekend :'D But we made plans with my friend to watch some anime since I'm bringing my laptop with me. Can't wait!

Love
Miki~

XXV

There were so many typos I had to fix them

So I finally graduated from high school, yaaay~ But I'll make another entry about it later after I've received my pics from that day. This one is going to be a little more personal and heart-to-heart kind of post. I just want to let some steam out and might even delete this entry afterwards.

~~~

Anyone of you has heard about an existential crisis? Well that's what has been going on with my life lately. I think it started when I went to high school, might be 'cause I finally got all of these huge responsibilities on my shoulders that I finally started questioning everything. Basically an existential crisis is when you start to question everything about living like why do we even live if there really is no purpose for it and that we actually are all alone in this universe and we don't really matter at all. You can just imagine how fun it was to think stuff like that when you had to study for your exams and think about your future. All I really wanted to do was lay on my bed and just hope that these thoughts would leave me alone since I didn't actually want to think like that. I wanted to enjoy my life to the fullest but my brain wouldn't let me.

Well some time passed and I got used to these thought since they appeared less frequently and I realized that when I was having an existential crisis the next day would be much enjoyable for me since I was usually so full of life and energy. But now it has gotten worse again. When my friends ask me to go out with me I just think "What's the point?" and decline the offer, I don't feel like taking care of myself cause I don't see the reason to do so, I can't even look at my sister's dog without thinking that he's gonna be dead at some point just like everyone else who's important to me. It's frustrating 'cause I really don't want to do that but my brain just won't shut up.

Maybe things have gotten worse is due to the fact that it look like everyone else is moving on and I'm just stuck in this same situation and place all the time. Some of them have gotten a new job, others are in a new relationship or have find something to be really passionate about. They know what they want for their future and I have not even a single clue what I'm gonna do. Well I don't want a massive change in my life but I just need something new. Otherwise I don't see a reason to get out of the bed and just merge with my sheets...

XXIV

Yay for the new name and layout! It took me awhile since I don't like to code with blogger at all :'D Even if it's just a little bit.

But for the reason why I decided to change the name: I've changed from the time I created this blog and the name didn't suit me at all anymore. There were even times when I grinned just even thinking about it. So here I am with a new one! Much depressing one actually... But I like it ´u` So it should be alright.

Oh and I'll change the url for this blog later so that everyone can see the change of the name~ You can find the new url from my old blog so keep an eye on it ´u`

~~~

I was going through my old music files on my laptop and discovered some pretty old song from the time I first started to download music to my computer. It was quite nostalgic so I thought it would be nice to share them with you :D Now you can see how horrible my music taste has been in some point (like it has gotten any better  lawl) but there are still some nice songs I still enjoy listening~ So here we go!

1. Nickelback - Photograph

This is one of the first songs I ever downloaded and it's from the 2007 so I was 12 back then... Man time flies ;-; I found this song from a website. It was there as a background music. Uh, those times when there was no fighting over copyrights, well not at least as much as now. I still love this song and listen to it from time to time. I don't get the hate over Nickelback tho... Please don't hate them, they have some awesome songs too ;-;

2. Megaherz - 5. März

First time I heard this song was actually from this AMV (from the time that Naruto was actually watchable lawl). This has to be the only German song that I have on my laptop and it's so good~ I've downloaded it the same year as the previous one and just like that one I still listen to this quite a lot.

3. My Chemical Romance - Famous Last Words

2008! An now we get to the awkward emo/angst phrase of my life, yay.... I still love MCR's music, I do, but I was just so embarrassing person back then. This song was a tricky one to find for me. First time I heard this was in a Youtube video. There was this person who had a part of the chorus playing as his video's intro. I didn't know the band and had no idea what the song was called but dang I loved how the song sounded. So I spent hours and hours looking for it and finally found it! And then began my love for MCR ´u`

4. Muse - Uno

We went on a year again so now it's 2009. This is my favorite song from Muse and it's a shame that most of the people who know Muse (from my friends, that is) haven't even heard this song ;-; Muse makes awesome music~ My other fave songs from them are Time is Running Out and Uprising ^-^

5. Stephen Lynch - If I were Gay

Yesh, I love this guy :'D He's a stand-up comedian from America who makes songs mocking people's daily life~ This wasn't the first song I heard from him but it's my favorite~ My sister was listening the one called Baby and I decided to find if he had more as awesome songs as that one and then I came across this~

6. Blindside - Sleepwalking

Yay, more emo songs... But I still like to listen to this orz I can thank this picture from this song~ Nothing much to say about the song :'D I just like it!

7. the GazettE - Filth in the Beauty

So I got to know to my number 1 band in 2009, yay! ^-^ This wasn't the first song I heard from them tho. But it's my fave so I thought I should put this in here~ Gazette was love at the first sight, if you can say that from music :'D I still find it funny that due to my appearance people usually think that I mostly listen to pop or something "light" music but nope, I prefer this kind of music much better~

~~~

I thought about making a Top 10 list but the Gazette seemed like a nice way to end the list since the music I listened after that is basically the same I listen to now ^-^ I still have a loooot more songs in my files but I showed you "the best ones". There were so many embarrassing ones ugh....

Best regards
Miki ♥

XXIII

Okay so let's continue my Japan adventure! Here's the part 2~

Day 6

Since we arrived to Kyoto the before, they decided to show us around the town this day. We did some sightseeing and visit Kiyomizu-dera (a Buddhist temple in eastern Kyoto), Kinkaku-ji (the Golden Pavilion) and some other places which names I can't remember... 

Day 7

This day we had some alone time ^-^ Me and my mom decided to do some shopping since we had to buy some souvenirs for our relatives and friends c: Tho I bought stuff through the whole trip so I decided to include them to this day! 

Sorry about the quality, I have a bad lighting in my room right now >-<

There's pretty much all I bought. Well including a kimono with an obi, some music stuff and socks, a lot of socks. Oh an I bought a huge amount of treats for my sis :'D We held a little tasting session when I got back home ´u` So many things I loved, so many things I hated...

Day 8

Now it was time to head towards Osaka! On our way there, we stopped in Nara and went to see Tōdai-ji (the Buddhist temple complex) and the deers *-* Oh my they were so cute~

Day 9

Our last full day in Japan! To be honest, this was my least favorite day of them all but I have a good reason for it. I mention in the first part that I'm frightened about heights. Well, During this day we went to visit the Umeda Sky Building, this 40-story tower that goes up to 173 meters. And this is where we had to go through those see-through escalators... The idea itself freaked me out even before we went on the trip and finally I got there and had to face them >-< I know that I might sound such a sissy but everyone who's afraid of heights can relate to me! Well we went up with the crew and I was one of the first ones to enter the escalator and tried to keep myself calm and not to watch through the windows. And then came the moment when I literally felt like I was going to die for the first time in my life. All of a sudden I heard a loud thump and when I looked right before me I could see a this large thing coming towards me. It was a man from our group that fell on me and the lady who was standing before me right in the middle of the escalator, when there was literally nothing below us than the metal structure that kept the escalator in the air. I don't know what happened and why he fell and of course I know that there's no way that the escalator could have fallen down or break or something but still. It was the longest minute of my life and my mom told me I looked like a white sheet for the rest of the day since I got so pale out of the shock... So yeah, happy memories! >'D (Oh yeah, we also visited the Osaka Castle but nothing interesting to tell about it really)

A view from the escalator~

Cute lockets that lovers leave there as a symbol of their relationship ^-^ The actual place was on the roof of the Umeba Sky Building but I was too afraid to go there...

~~~

That's pretty much it! On the 10th day we just left to the airport and headed back to Finland. Ugh, I just want to go back already. So many things I still want to see~ And do you know the feeling when you go to a certain place and you just feel like you belong there? Like it's all just so familiar and you feel that you've been there your whole life. No? Is it just me? Haha, I don't know but that was the feeling I had most of the time!

N ♥ 

XXII

I wanted to write something to my blog since I didn't want to take a long break again but I haven't just felt like writing about my trip to Japan right now :'D I don't know, it might be that I don't really like to process my images. But there will be a part two about the trip! Not just right now, sorry >-<

Because I don't really have anything else to talk about right now, since I've mostly been indoors cause it's so freaking hot here in Finland (and my sunscreen gave me allergies so I look like I have some kind of a plague and I don't feel like showing myself to people...), I decided to do another tag~ I really enjoy doing these so here you go :'D

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ~『✧~*ABOUT YOU*~✧』
1. Are you more feminine or masculine?
- Feminine I guess? At least most of the time

2. Are you tall or short?
- In the middle

3. What's your favorite color?
- Baby pink but I've really started to like baby blue as well

4. What do you love about yourself?
-  That I' not ashamed of myself and I dare to be who I am. I think it's pretty badass :b

5. What's your greatest flaw?
- My short temper in certain situations

6. Do you see yourself differently than other people describe you?
- I do~

7. What are you really, really good at?
- Adapting in situations. I usually know how to behave ^-^

8. What's something you're bad at, but love?
- Dancing or cooking. I suck at both but enjoy doing them c:

9. What's something people have tried to force you to do?
- Start exercising? I only do it when I feel like it

10. How do you spend your free time?
- I spend it with my beloved laptop ♥

11. Describe the way you dress in one sentence.
- I don't really care about my clothes right now cause I've been so tired lately that I don't feel like putting an effort to my appearance

12. Have you ever gotten your nails professionally painted?
- I have!

13. What is the most insulting thing anyone has said to you?
- That I'm stupid and I don't care about others

14. Favorite game?
- Fatal Frame series!

15. What color is your hair?
- Very light blond

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ~『✧~*PHILOSOPHY*~✧』
16. Do you believe in god? Care to tell why?
-  I do but I don't really have a reason why, I just do

17. Is men's rights a thing?
- Why not equal rights?

18. Does love really exist?
- Yup

19. Can science explain everything, eventually?
- I don't think so. It can explain almost everything eventually but not _everything_

20. Are we raised into what we love, or do we come to love it based on how we were raised?
- Last one21. How do you feel about the school system?
- In Finland, it sucks. We should do something about it soon >-<

22. Do you believe in fate/destiny?
- I don't want to believe in it~

23. What is art?
- Art!

24. Do we define ourselves, or does our past?
- As much as I would like to say that we do but unfortunately our past still has a huge effect on it

25. What happens after we die?
- Ugh, I don't want to think about it

26. Do humans matter (tiny specs on a floating piece of rock in a solar system in a galaxy in an infinite universe)?
- No

27. What religion?
- Christian

28. Is there good in everyone?
- Yesh

29. Is human life only valuable because our society makes it?
- Every life is valuable

30. How do you feel about society, the vague "they" blamed for everything? 
- ...wha?

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ~『✧~*LOVEY-DOVEY PREFERENCE STUFF*~✧』
31. What gender do you prefer?
- Guys? Usually they fit the qualities I like better

 32. What's the first thing you notice about someone?
- Voice! It's always the voice ´u`

33. Could you love someone you found ugly?
- I found a person ugly based on his/her personality so of course no

34. Favorite hair color?
- I prefer darker hair but it really doesn't matter

35. Favorite eye color?
- Everything is fine!

36. Ideal height?
- Taller than me?

37. Describe, personality-wise, what your ideal boy/girlfriend would be like?
- Someone mature, kind, smart, caring, kinda straight forward and really ambitious about things he likes. But to be honest, I actually like this bad boy type since I think I would go kinda well with a guy like that :'D 

38. Describe, appearance-wise, what your ideal boy/girlfriend would be like? 
- So ideal boyfriend here! Height between 178-188, fit but not too muscular and fine dark hair. Warm and friendly smile but when serious, he has that sharp and firm look on his face. Here is da perfect body >///<

39. What do you look for--brains or looks?
- Both? More brains tho... Braaains

40. Could you fall in love online?
- I think so since the appearance doesn't matter that much~

41. How much of an age cap can you handle?
- Well 2 years younger than me and.... Well maybe 10 years older would be a little too old, haha

42. How would you introduce yourself on a blind date?
- A no-lifer nerd who's too attached on the internet. Charming, huh? :'D

43. Could you forgive a cheater?
- Depends on how far did they go

44. Is lying about something serious as bad as cheating?
- Well it's not cheating but if the stuff you're lying is really important then it's an serious issue

45. Right now, you could call the person you like/love (if you aren't dating/engaged/married already), or show up at their front door, and just confess or kiss them or whatever. What's stopping you?
- Mixed feelings and I don't think he would want me 

~~~

Well that was fun! I promise to do that Japan entry next time c:

N ♥